It’s been almost three years since we broke up. I don’t know why but to this day I still find myself looking at you and thinking “man, I love him.”
I finally realize and accept that you never loved me as much as I loved you. Even though you said it, even though we were always there for each other, I think you were still too immature at the time. We were kids and we still are. But there’s something about you, John, that takes over me every time I think about you. No matter how hard I try to let go of it, it’s still there.
I think it’s because I know things about you that no one else in this world knows. So when I look at you, I think about those things and that is what makes me love you. We used to tell each other that we’d always love each other, and no matter how true that statement is for you, it still is and always will be true for me.
As you know, I am now in a serious relationship with someone that I am head over heels in love with. I couldn’t be happier and I know that he loves me for who I am and that is all I could ask for. You and I have regained our friendship, and for that I am thankful. But just because I am in love with someone else does not mean I can’t still love you. You were my first love and I would like to thank you for giving me an amazing year that I will always cherish. I may not be in love with you, John, but I really do love you and I wish I could tell you that without it being a problem. Anyways, I wish you the very very best.