At some point about six months ago something broke inside me and I don’t know how to fix it. There’s a black hole in my chest that seems to be sucking all the joy out of me. I used to be happy, I can still be happy but only for fleeting moments before I’m back feeling broken. It sounds so melodramatic and usually I would tell myself to man-up and be strong, but I’m tired of being strong now. I want to be able to cry, I want to be able to be affectionate to the boy I love and more than anything I want that boy to hold me and dry my tears away and tell that I’m fine, that we’re fine, that everything’s fine. But he won’t. He’s busy with his life and I don’t feel like a part of it any more.
I have so many amazing things in my life. I am young, I am intelligent, I am attractive, I have friends, I have wonderful parents who seem to be willing to anything for me. I have no reason to feel like this. And yet I do.
Can someone put me back together please? I don’t know where all the pieces go anymore.