I hate not knowing whether you’re being genuine with me or if I’m being played for a fool.
I hate that you could easily be manipulating me for attention, and I’m just the latest toy in a constantly rotating procession, or you’re the closest thing I have had to a real friend (and lover) in ages.
I hate that we both have issues with trust and commitment. I wonder not only if you think the same about me, but if you devote even 1% of your time thinking about me that I do thinking about you.
I don’t even like how we kissed half of the time, and even hated the first time, but I can’t stop thinking about your smile and all the things we’ve talked about. Our goals, our dreams, our interests, and our past issues.
I would’ve never imagined when I first met you that you could be a lasting friend, let alone lover, even within the first 2 weeks of meeting you.
I still struggle to think how any of this happened.
And yet, despite all the doubts and lack of sparks when we first met and barriers now you’ve put up between us, I can’t stop thinking that somehow we’re supposed to be friends for life.