• the things you do to me

    by  • November 17, 2011 • Hope, Yearning for You • 4 Comments

    I’m writing this in the hopes that its publication will give me a starting point from which to move on, but at the same time I’m not so sure I want to.

    I try to convince myself that the timing of our meeting wasn’t right, or that you’ve never felt the way I do, but I never can quite believe these. At this point there are any number of reasons to give up on you, but I can never bring myself to do it. Any tiny glimmer of hope for us keeps me going.

    Fuck distance, fuck circumstance; all I want is what we had that one night – except this time you won’t move halfway across the country three weeks later. You’ll stay here, we’ll get to know each other properly, we’ll listen to The Doors and write together and paint and draw, and you’ll be my inspiration. We’ll stay up late talking about anything and everything and we’ll drink wine until my eyes can only focus on you. When we run out, you’ll rest your sleepy head in my lap and I’ll stay awake so I can see how beautiful you are when you sleep. Wait, scratch that – you’re beautiful all the time.

    These scenarios make me hopeful but they also make me terribly sad.. Because I know that they will probably never happen again.

    I don’t know if you feel anything like this towards me. But the last time I saw you I felt like you were holding something back. All I wanna do is tell you all this but I’m scared that you don’t feel the same and that my fantasy is gonna come crashing down…

    Fuck. I don’t know what to do.

    Related Post

    4 Responses to the things you do to me

    1. A girl in the distance
      November 17, 2011 at 3:25 pm

      I know it wasn’t your intent, but this brought me to tears.
      Tell them. Please.


    2. Someone
      November 17, 2011 at 11:27 pm

      As someone who moved halfway across the country, I know I wish someone I cared about told me not to. Tell them, even if they’re already gone.


    3. Stay Infinite
      November 17, 2011 at 11:44 pm

      It is strange how I stumbled upon this page by accident. I can immensely relate to this exact situation.

      It’s an excruciating feeling.
      I curse nights when I’m left alone in my bed, wondering who he could be holding in his arms at that very moment, remembering how good it felt when he held me.

      You are not alone.
      I never want to experience distance ever again.


    4. Missa
      November 18, 2011 at 5:11 pm

      They need to know as much as you need to tell them..

      Even if it doesn’t work out, even if they don’t quite feel the same way you do.. (This is so beautiful, I cannot imagine that being the case.)

      I’m making distance work for me, and I am the happiest girl in the world because of it. It all came down to a choice– I told him how I felt, and meant every word of it. I was scared. I still am.. distance is hard, it is. It will be until the distance is severed. But it’s so worth it. So unbelievably worth it.

      Making your choice to tell them.. it gives them the choice. If you never tell them, and they feels the same way, both of you will feel cheated. It’s not worth it. It’s not worth it to lose something as beautiful as a chance at love.

      I wish you two the best of luck! Listen to your heart. <3



    Leave a Reply