It’s been 6 months, and despite everything I just can’t get you out of my mind. I wish I could tell you how much I miss you, your smile, the way you made me feel when we were together, the way we would laugh together, talk for hours, make love.
I wish I could tell you how much my heart is breaking as I write this letter, how I wish I could move on but I can’t. I’ve tried deleting you from my life and it has only made it harder, made me think about you more. I’ve been on dates, other guys want me, but all I can think about is you. The more time I spend with other men the more empty I feel.
I wonder if you even think about me anymore…you called a few months ago and even told me you missed me…but then when we saw each other you were so distant, like I was just a friend, not someone you had once shared everything with.
I still don’t know what went wrong. Was it religion? The distance? The money pressures? Did you really not love me? I was sure that you did or I would never have sent you that picture…if I could take that moment back I would. The last thing I wanted was to put pressure on you.
I feel pretty pathetic even writing this letter. I don’t know if I will ever hear from you again but if I could tell you one thing, it is that I will never forget you and despite what you think, it really was love for me. Despite everything that has happened since, all the pain this has caused me, I’ll always remember that summer in Paris.