• I just need to know… <3

    by  • November 11, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Dating • 0 Comments

    Myles,

    So here it goes… spilling everything I have on paper hoping that maybe you’ll see it, or maybe you won’t. But if I can’t tell you how I’m feeling someone ought to know.

    We have been talking now for over a month and as short a time as that is, I have never felt so vulnerable. You make me feel so special, and so scared all at the same time. Giving someone the power to break you and trusting them not to is so scary. All it would take is for you to say let’s just be friends and I’d be crushed. But instead, you stay over what seems to be every other night. We go out for a couple drinks and come back and have “fun,” but is that all it is? When I’m with you I feel this incredible connection, and I want to tell you so bad, but I’m afraid to push you away. I don’t want to rush things, but I do wanna know where I stand. When we are together its non-stop laughter and waking up to you in the morning is the most amazing feeling in the world. Your arms wrapped around me and that big smile across your face, sometimes I feel like I’m dreaming. I wanna say something so bad, but I don’t want it to stop. You mean so much to me, and that night we drove back from the bar, and we got pulled over my heart sank, because I thought that was it, you’d never talk to me again. I shoulda never given you my keys, but we are passed that now. You came over last night and I tested you. We went to a movie I knew you wouldn’t like, but like a champ you tagged along and I giggled as you hid your eyes in your hood avoiding all possible embarrassment. That meant so much to me. When we got back to that situation, that well was awkward for me and not you at all, you made jokes and made feel so comfortable. Even though you are the reason this whole awkward situation happens on a daily basis. But it’s okay I forgive you, and we get some really great laughs out of it.

    I just want to know what it is that’s going through your mind. Every time we hang out, I get so nervous. Not because I’m afraid to say the wrong thing, but because all I can think about when we are together or apart is you and for you to have this pull on me kills me, because as I said before, I hate being vulnerable.

    On top of it all we work together! It’s so funny for me to have to put on the work front, when all I wanna do is run up and give you the biggest hug n for you to kiss me on the forehead and say “hey you.” I don’t think you realize the pull you have over me. No one including you probably understands this, but in that little bit of time that we have been “seeing each other” I have become incredibly attached to the thought of us. Call me crazy, but it just clicks for me, and although it scares me, I just wish you’d open up and say you feel the same, because the kisses, hugs and cuddling makes me feel like you do, but at the same time, I just need to know…

    Call me crazy

    Related Post

    Leave a Reply