I genuinely dislike you as a person, and sometimes I feel bad about it because I don’t even know what you did to warrant such total loathing on my part, but it’s there.
When I first met you in middle school I didn’t like you. Probably because you liked the same boy as me or something but by the time highschool came around you had circulated through most of the other girls in our grade and so we became best friends.
You let me live with you when I got kicked out, and I don’t think I realized how awesome that was until later on in my life, but it was pretty awesome for you and your family to do that.
And then something fell apart.
I moved back in with my dad and started dating your ex. Your highschool ex that you dated for less than two months and then broke up with because you didn’t think he was good looking enough for you. And yet you were bitter about it, you thought I’d taken your best guy friend away from you, and in a way I guess that I did. In a small town you’re always stepping on someone’s toes but we dated for almost four years, and that’s a long time to harbor a grudge.
We drifted apart, you’ve always been the type to do and say whatever your sister does and says and that started to irritate me. You’re judgmental and you treat people like they’re disposable.
You went through a phase of saying you were going to go to India and Nepal and save the world, and of course just ended up going as a tourist and not trying to make even the slightest impact. And the thing is, that’s okay. But you’re not upfront with who you really are, you live in this imaginary world where you think that everyone will love you if you just project this bullshit image of yourself.
I guess I see through it.
I guess I’m not falling for it.
I have disliked you for years. No matter what I do I can’t seem to let go of it and I just wish that you’d disappear from my life. I’ve tried to talk to you about it with you, I’ve held up my end of the bargain, you’re not interested. And yet you’re interested in talking shit about me behind my back, I guess you peaked in highschool and you’ve just become a worse person since so maybe that’s why you still act like you’re there.
I wish we didn’t have mutual friends and I wish that I wouldn’t ever have to see or hear your name again, because just the sound of your name pisses me off.
Some people say that you can’t truly hate someone unless you’ve truly loved them, and maybe that’s part of the problem, that we were so close. Or maybe the problem is that you’re a crazy bitch.