Sometime I wish you would just go get drunk and fuck up. So i can break up with you and not have any regrets and worry it was my fault and I was asking too much. We have been together for two years. You and I were each other’s firsts, i was 16 when i met you and you were 21. We met at the beach, we have been crazy for each other. I am 18 and a freshman in college and you like always, never graduated from highschool and don’t have a job and still live at home. But are trying to start a buisness.] But it’s not working. I have always been intelligent, you haven’t so we have our cultural differences and intelligent differences, i just want to be able to talk to you and you understand. Your pride gets in the way, you are selfish, Greedy, Take me for granted all the time. That’s probably why your ex girlfriend left you for your best friend. I’m a bitch because i have so much pent anger towards you. Although my feelings are so strong. I feel as though i need you. My identity is in you. I wanted a life with you. I love you so much, i love you so much i come to your house every day after hours at the gym at classes and going to work. I stay at your parents house with you til 2 am with 8 am classes the next day after driving 45 mins to come see you and then another to go home. Been there EVERY DAY for the past two years. 97% of the time it is me coming for you and doing things for you. I Have missed out on my family these past two years and put you first before anyone. I do everything to keep this relationship going. I wish that would change i wish i was stronger than I am, I pray for a sign and the strength to know it’s not working. I flip out on you constantly and we fight angrily. Because I am SOOO Incredibly unhappy. I hate fighting, you have changed me for the worst. I just don’t have the strength . I can’t enjoy life as much when i’m around you. I don’t have the strength to officially break up with you. I feel as though I am clinically depressed or have low self esteem, but that’s because i’m surrounded by an asshole. I just know that when i break up with you for good, or vice versa. I will be so scared to see you when you’re with another person and see you even happier without me. I just want you to change, I want you to put in more effort. But i can’t change you and that’s where this is wrong, all wrong. We are not right for each other. I wish one of us had the strength to say goodbye forever.