• One of the hearts in your jar

    by  • November 3, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Moving On • 0 Comments

    To Tiger,

    You always wanted me to call you that. How true it turned out to be. When you asked to be called tiger, I thought you wanted to feel empowered and sexy. I had no idea how ferocious and malicious you really were.

    Did it even bother you? Do you ever wonder how I felt afterwards? Do you ever wonder how much you might have hurt me or how messed up I might be because of you?

    No matter how many times I said “no” you kept going. You never heard a single plea of mine, yet I was forced to listen to every word you said. You made sure of that. You never once acknowledged what you did to me. Well let me tell you what you did.

    You broke my heart, but not because I loved you. I never loved you. You tricked me into staying with you, and in the end you repeatedly and mercilessly abused me. Some people call what you did an unfinished murder – how fitting. Did you even notice my lifeless eyes?
    Not only did you abuse me sexually, you abused me mentally and emotionally. Do you have any idea the burden you put on my shoulders? You not only stole what was most important to me, but you made me listen to all of your adventures, even though some of those “adventures” were about how you cheated on me and about how you abused my friends. After what you did to me, why did you keep coming back to me. For help? Why would you need my help after how much you messed me up?

    You went around hurting people. You went around ruining relationships and stealing innocence, and you never saw anything wrong with it.

    Now you are a marine. Do you have any idea how much it kills me that you are allowed to wear that uniform? That uniform should be a symbol of respect and impeccable character. If only your superiors knew what you have done…
    You now gain all the respect that your position demands, but you sit safe behind a desk. You are not in combat and you are not at risk. You sit at a desk and flip switches.

    You are not someone to respect. You are a trickster, a prankster, a heart breaker, a cheater, and an abuser of women. You will never earn my respect.

    No Longer Your Victim

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