I’m sitting here looking at the computer screen. Trying to figure out what to say next.
Trying to figure out if I’m writing this for myself, to get things off of my chest or am I just going to type this all out, then not publish it.
Well, for starters, I’m a teenager.
16 1/2 years old.
I’m very active in theatre.
I’m a singer & an actress. Dancing isn’t my favorite.
I’m pretty, but not gorgous.
I’m outgoing & loud, but I have a very laid back & easy-going side.
I have been played by boys.
I thought I found love, all I did was find out what lust was.
I have been pressured for sex, drugs, and drinking, & proudly to say that I have turned them all down.
I’m very smart, I have A’s & a few B’s.
I’m scared about my entire life.
You may just think that I’m a normal girl, living a normal life.
It’s far from that.
I have a brother going to the Marines, I’m scared to death that he may not come back.
I have been in a controling relationship with a guy.
I’m scared about what’s going to happen next in my life.
I’ve been abused.
I’ve been hurt.
I’ve hurt others.
I’m to the point where I don’t think I’m all that amazing, that I will never be good enough for anyone.
Everyday I see people throw words around like; whore, slut, bitch, dike, gay, faggot, and many more.
I want to be the change in the world, I just don’t know where to start.
I love my family & my friends more than anything in this world.
I’m scared that I will just give up everything because I can’t handle it.
I’m wishing that the next 16 years of my life will be amazing. That everything will turn out like a fairy tale.
But I know that won’t happen, so I’ll make the best out of it.