• California

    by  • July 25, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Friends • 7 Comments

    So, this must be it then. After the four years of friendship.

    I felt like we finally had it all. Maybe I was just over-reacting. Maybe I’m just too gullible, or maybe you know exactly what to say to leave me vulnerable.

    Friendship is supposed to be easy, it was all so simple back then. There was no thinking, no dissecting. I was not hanging on every word like some smacked out junkie.

    I knew you always had feelings for me. I was smart back then. I knew it would ruin our “platonic” illusion of the perfect duo. You finally succeeded. Only you could sneak in the cracks and break down the perfect walls I have constructed around my emotions.

    Now all I do is think about you, in a way i never did before. I liked it. It was working. The missing chain links were all connected and the puzzle was put into place. We were perfect. Now I’m leaving, now you won’t speak to me. Now I’m dwelling on every last sentence looking for where it all went wrong. I’m sorry I have to go. I’m sorry you’re scared. You’re breaking my heart.

    7 Responses to California

    1. emily
      July 26, 2011 at 12:02 am

      What is your first name?

    2. anonymous
      July 26, 2011 at 12:12 pm

      my name is not important. This is what happens when you get pathetically drunk have access to the Internet at 3am.

    3. emily
      July 26, 2011 at 9:47 pm

      well good luck with everything, This letter fits my current life perfectly and I guess I got hopeful for a second in a fit of stupidity.

    4. anonymous
      July 26, 2011 at 11:56 pm

      That’s not stupid! It happens to the best of us. Good luck! Boys are just awful sometimes.

    5. Mary
      July 27, 2011 at 7:52 am

      I’m going to miss you too. We did have it all. I don’t know what happened to make it fall apart. The feelings between us were just getting to be too much. But you’re right, I did always know how to make you vulnerable, I knew how to make you smile and laugh-I’ll never forget the way you used to look at me after I made you giggle from some silly comment of mine. I think about you all the time, especially when I pass by your street; I do all that I can to avoid that street. I love you so much. I will never forget you.

    6. Anonymous
      July 27, 2011 at 11:31 am

      “Mary,” i really hope thats not your real name. I have no idea if that is your real identity, or if your response just so happens to fit my letter and situation perfectly. Please, if it is who I hope it is, call me. I want to say goodbye.

    7. Mary
      August 2, 2011 at 6:06 pm

      To be honest, I don’t think I am who you are hoping for me to be. My real name is Mary but the best friend that I was in love with would never have written something like this. I wish I could call you just to make you feel better though. We all have struggles in life.. What doesn’t break you, only makes you stronger. Everyone is going to hurt you; you just have to decide who is worth the pain.

      I want to say goodbye to you too, but after the last time I tried to talk to you.. I know your wall has been built up again. I’ll miss you so much

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