• Waiting.

    by  • July 23, 2011 • Friends • 0 Comments

    Okay. This is going to be bitter, spiteful, honest..it’s going to hurt to write, and maybe even to read, but here it goes.

    I have shitty friends. I’ve been trying to tell myself that this isn’t true, that they’re all just preoccupied with themselves, their relationships, their jobs, college, pets, hobbies, families….but no. I just have shitty friends. The kind that only call you to be a DD when they’re too drunk to drive home from the bar, not even considering that it’s 3am, a Wednesday, and they have no gas money for me…yet I still drive out and pick them up, get them food to soothe their hangovers…and get nothing but a “Thanks!” as they slam the door of my car.

    WHAT THE FUCK. Normal people would probably just let these sorts of people fade in and out of their lives quickly, but no. I feel terrible when I don’t answer a phone call, or feel guilty when I ignore a text message.

    “What’s up?”

    What’s up? That’s all you have to ask me after everything I’ve done? Everything I’ve dealt with? What’s up is that you made out with him, the only guy who I’d had feelings for in YEARS…when YOU had a boyfriend, and you didn’t even say sorry. No apologies for totally ruining any chance I had. It’s not your fault, I know. “I was so drunk, I didn’t know what I was doing.”

    Yeah? You’ve done this countless times. Do you know how hard it is to look into his eyes and have a normal conversation, when I know for a fact you’ve cheated on him about 8 times? It’s hard.

    And you…the gorgeous, irresistable, showstopping best friend…oh god.

    I love you to death, I really do. We’ve hung out almost every day for the past 3 years. Now…take a good look at yourself. You should know better. You’ve been through hell, being molested by your uncle as a kid, having to move as a teenager, losing your virginity at a young age with a boy who now denies even knowing you…yeah, those things suck. But at least you’re beautiful. Because that’s all you care about, you make sure you’re wearing the best clothes, make-up, carrying the best bags…how the hell am I supposed to get any attention at all when you’re around? It’s not like I’m attention hungry, but I’d love to see the day that ONE single guy looks at me longer than he looks at you. I’d love to see him try and get my number, instead of you throwing your numbers out there like a fake Lotto ticket.

    You’re better than that.

    Okay. I think I’ve gotten this out. Everybody needs to rave and rant and say everything they hate about their best friends at some point…don’t lie to yourself…there’s tons of things you don’t like. Do they chew loudly? Do they drive too slow? Do they always leave their phone on silent? Whatever. You know you secretly hate them…but you also know there’s no way in hell you’d be able to live without them.

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