Movies i’ve never even heard of.
My little brother.
My broken heart.
It’s all you. Your face was in my head as I typed everyone word of this letter so far.
But hell, the list can go on for days, it’ll probobly wont stop. Because everything reminds me of you.
I just don’t understand how I trusted you so much. You were everything I never wanted to be, right? Right. You made me be the exact person I always said I never would be. Still I couldn’t get enough of you…
My best friend’s mom even asked me why i was with you. “you can do sooo much better”, that’s exactly what she told me after meeting you and knowing your reputation.
Then you go on senior week, i trusted you. you never gave me a reason not to, so i did. God, i longed for those drunk texts at 4 in the morning telling me to wake up so you could talk to me. i really thought maybe you were falling for me. you clever boy, you. come home, wait a few days, text me to tell me you cheated on me… i don’t think i ever told you that you’re the 7th gut that cheated on me in two years. damn, there has to be something wrong with me, not matter how much you disagree with that. still i took you back. trusted you. gave you everything. then you left. you’ve been with your ex since you walked away from me, and since we’ve been together, with a part of me i’ll never get back. no matter how much it kills me, you’re always gonna have it. At least i can act like i don’t care. i can get up and act happy and act like my heart isn’t shattered to pieces for the first time in my life. no big deal. i can act like it doesn’t bother me to know i’ll never be on your mind again and tell people that one day, you’re gonna grow up, act mature and be an awesome person.
so tomorrow, and everyday after that, i’m gonna wake up and be “happy”. put on a smile and bright eyes. just like your favorite band.
you’re the boy that i’ll never forget, no matter how much it hurts me,