• Pseudo Intellectual

    by  • July 18, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Frustration • 4 Comments

    Since you were kind enough to tell me how not good enough I am, let me help you, by shedding light on the very person that you are 🙂

    [Don’t worry, it’s FREE!]

    You are the biggest Pseudo – Intellectual I have ever met. In fact, I believe the word was invented for someone of your very nature.

    You think you’re ‘intelligent’?

    What use does knowledge have, it you have not the wisdom to apply it?
    I have never met a more pompous, self-indulgent, puts himself up high on a pedestal man, more than yourself. I cannot even call you a man, for a man has a better sense of understanding of a person’s feelings. I didn’t say woman, I said person. You boast of how well you can understand people and how you are a ‘mind reader’? Haha. You say so much but they lack zest and emotion, making everything you ever told me, blank, void and empty of the human touch.

    You attempt to flex intellect that does not exist within your mind. You look up new insults that are synonymous with “stupid” in order to boost your own undeserved ego. You posses a severe tendency to blindly and wholeheartedly believe any bull you hear, only to subsequently regurgitate the misinformation to anyone they see in an asinine attempt to appear more intelligent than a used, broken condom.

    And best of all… You are typically a hypocrite; creating many, many contradictions. You cannot even remember the stuff you say, probably cause you’re so soaked on doing weed everyday so your brain cells are as smoked as bacon on a Sunday BBQ. You cannot stick to your word and say stuff trying to sound intelligent, without even knowing what you’re talking about. Your opinions aren’t facts in the first place.

    What I thought of you as eloquence was merely you using “big words” to impress people and you insist on being politically-correct all the time, constantly bitching about “the system”, and thinking you’re a ‘god’ among men because you assume you’re the BEST human ever and that you’re my bench mark to finding my husband? Please.

    You go against common thought without evidence, bringing up intellectualism in non-requisite situations. You prefer to read than watch television, because television is too, ‘mainstream’ ? Lol.

    You try soo hard to not be “typical” by saying you like whatever isn’t the trend. You completely miss the point about actually enjoying something cause you’re too caught up at trying to look cultured, therefore you are a poser. And don’t think that by acting “eccentric” you differentiate yourself from the masses and seem unique, your kind is quite common.

    Obviously, this is me hurting for you. I still believe that there is something redeemable in you. Don’t you see? You are already unique, I don’t know why you need to feel like you should be anymore ‘different’. Clearly, you’re screaming for attention from an obvious inward lacking. There’s a vacuum in your soul, that you try to silence by silly methods. I told you how you might be able to fill it, but you just won’t listen.

    Oh, and yea, even though you study there, your consistent criticizing of America and its citizens for no good reason, except based on some random silly documentary that tells you that black is blue, is sooo pathetic.

    A pseudo-intellectual [aka YOU] is someone who is too stupid to realize they are a pseudo-intellectual. This person is well armed with defense mechanisms, is extremely caustic and passive aggressive in the interest of protecting and preserving their delusions of grandeur.

    Your “conscience”? Ha. Here’s what it says – “Wow… I’m reading all these definitions of pseudo-intellect and my personality completely matches their descriptions… Must boost self-esteem and let the world know how intellectual I am. I know! I’ll create a pseudonym called kookoodumdum and exploit my shattered ego! There. I’m a pseudo-pseudo-intellectual. I rule.”

    So YOU.

    You said you would do something and convinced me enough to believe it and then as if it were no big deal, you change your mind, oh no wait, your ‘perspective’ to do it on a small scale.

    More? Certainly 🙂

    A P-I is someone who pursues knowledge in a variety of categories for purely social reasons and tends to have only a basic understanding of many concepts. The pseudo-intellectual doesn’t seek knowledge for the purpose of better understanding the world, but rather to enhance their image. They also prefer to interpret concepts in a way that allows them to use their knowledge as a weapon in social scenarios. They’ll use the misinterpretation of facts to appear objective and correct, and thus unaccountable, when “talking shit” on another person. The pseudo-intellectual will challenge opinions or views as a way of making a personal attack. They then usually assume an imagined victory and will feel that the one they’ve attacked has been “put in their place”. Pseudo-intellectuals are very catty and have a strong desire to socially dominate others. Pseudo-intellectuals are quick to judge others and are usually very sure of their superiority based on their ability to use knowledge as social ammo. They’ll use any means available to prove themselves “correct” and tend to believe that being correct gives them a blank check for any social pursuits, including ones that are undertaken purely for self gratification. Given their usual motivation to either impress or dominate their peers, the Pseudo-intellectual is completely uninterested in any knowledge that they can’t use in this capacity.

    I know! Sounds soooo much like you doesn’t it? 😀
    You’re welcome!

    But wait! There’s more 😀

    “You derive a great deal of pleasure by “enlightening” others with your “brilliance” and “wit”. Primary method of operation: Using irony and sarcasm to taunt those who they believe do not live up to their standards. Virtually every word out of their mouth is some unnecessary, smart a** remark. They lack the ability to have a genuine, sincere conversation with anyone. Instead of having a healthy, balanced, back-and-forth exchange, they pontificate and talk down to those who have the misfortune of not escaping the room before they walk in. It is a waste of time to point out to these disturbed individuals that their behavior is obnoxious, as they will inform you that you simply lack the ability to understand their “superior” view of the world. Basically, it’s someone who thinks that being an argumentative wise a** somehow makes them cultured and fun to be around, and that shouting at the rain and being disagreeable for the sake of being disagreeable somehow makes them substantive.”

    I mean. Come on. This is all YOU.

    I can go on and on, but really. This is enough ‘PROOF’ isn’t it, because to you, everything NEEDS proof!

    Even Love needs proof. I told you that no matter what, I Love You and your reply, “But why? What’s the reason?” And not in the ‘aww, but why me?” kinda cute reasoning, you asked for the reason because even something as beautiful and purposeful as Love in itself, needs a reason.

    I tell you truly, Love needs NO reason. It just is. Love is patient and kind… and you know the rest, I have told you and showed you the agape kind of Love sooo many times. But you close your eyes and ears to things that you don’t want to accept because they aren’t LOGICAL.

    Well, koo koo bananas with logic! Logic can only take you so far on your road to happiness. But Love, and inner peace will take you to the moon and back.

    It took me long enough but I see how absolutely IMMATURE and you are the ONE WHO CANNOT INTELLECTUALLY STIMULATE anybody, not even a… monkey, which, well, you believe you came from. Lol.

    You’re better off with your logic anyway, and when the dust settles, you’re going to realize someday [hopefully, when you grow a pair and become ‘wise’ [you’re so shallow, low and ignorant that there’s no sign of wisdom showing anyway, I doubt you even have ‘wisdom teeth’!]

    Your words were empty. Just like your head.
    But I still Love you. Tough Love huh?

    I have never been one to as much as entertain a negative thought in my head, and I am sorry if this hurts you. I never wanted to even type this, because it can be hard to swallow because it is hurtful to read all this [if you ever do and I strongly hope you do] But it’s the Truth. And the Truth usually does.

    Yours sincerely [a word you’re not aware of because you have no sincerity]

    You obviously know who I am 🙂

    4 Responses to Pseudo Intellectual

    1. Poppy M.
      July 19, 2011 at 8:35 am


      I know someone just like this!

    2. BOBP
      October 10, 2011 at 10:32 am


    3. .
      October 10, 2011 at 10:55 am

      mmm had a good grin about this one 🙂

    4. Maria
      October 11, 2011 at 2:43 am


      You deserve better.

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