I’ll never forget that day, when we met, you looking delicious in the upstairs bathroom, me walking up the steps and marveling at this wonderful stranger, the awkward hello. Your wonderful smile, your generous spirit so blatantly evident in 10 seconds.
I’ll never forget the breakfast with everyone, you catching my eye, relating to every little comment i made. Us realizing the amount we have in common.
That hug as i left that same day, you demanding the first hug, the longest hug. Closing my eyes as i rested against your wide chest, your strong arms encompassing me completely. I’ve never felt safer.
But now as I wait for that friend request on facebook it dawns on me that our meeting didn’t mean as much to you as it did to me. I understand that it was one day, and that that was it.
I just wanted to let you know that you’re such an incredible person. That your heart is golden. That i’ll always remember you fondly, and maybe even say a prayer for you.
I realise that we would have never worked anyway.
So instead of ignoring my pride and adding YOU, i now simply accept the fact that i’ll probably never see or talk to you again, or if i do it’ll be in some random bar in 10 years time, and who knows what could happen then?
And yes, i still get ridiculous bouts of the butterflies every time i even hear your name, and yes, i crave for moments alone where i can conjure up scenarios involving me and you.
However, regardless of all this, i have decided that this is a goodbye letter. You have struck me dumb, but i know it’s not two-sided, so i’ll let you get on with your life… and i swear i’ll try get on with mine.
I just wish you loved me.
More than anything, i wish you loved me.