As I’ve told you many times before, there are no words to describe how I feel about you. You’re perfect for me in every way. You say you need to figure your life and and find some direction. You say you don’t want to drag me through any of it. You say you need time.
Well, I’m willing to wait for you. Willing to keep on loving you even if you can’t quite accept my love. Willing to wait and see if you still love me when life is a little more settled.
I miss skyping you late at night when we are both silly from lack of sleep (I miss skyping you when we were both wide-awake, too, because we were still silly then) and being able to wake up before you and text you to say “I love you.” I miss finding pictures of cuddling animals on the interweb and being able to say “This is us.” Now, I send them but don’t say anything, and hope you realize what I would be saying if things were still the same.
I don’t know how long it will be–months, maybe years–but I’m going to wait. I may be young and foolish, but for three months you made me the happiest I have ever been in my life. Your smile, your wit, and your insistance on making fun of my typos made me feel ebullient and inebriated. Your kind words and positivity outlook rubbed off on me, and truly made me a better and ridiculously ecstatic person. My friends didn’t know why, but they noticed my everyday mood changed for the better.
I don’t know if you know I still feel this way, or if any of your former love for me still exists. I don’t plan on telling you or asking about your feelings because I don’t want to push you away. I already feel like we are drifting apart, but I refuse to let that happen. Even if you move on, I’ll still love you. Even if I move on, I’ll still love you. You’ve impacted too greatly to ever be completely gone from my life.
Thank you for the fabulous happiness you’ve inflicted on me.
I love you.