• just a stupid, lonely teenager.

    by  • July 16, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Loneliness • 0 Comments

    i love the way i feel when i wake up in the morning, (and as cheesy as this sounds) i feel like a rainbow after a rainy/dull day. i think to myself… “i don’t need anyone else to be happy, i’m happy to be myself and i love being single!” but then i get dressed, eat breakfast, do my hair and makeup and then head to school. i walk through the school gates with my head held high, but as soon as i see my friends kissing, laughing, flirting with their boyfriends, i lose that rainbow feeling and i guess reality just kicks in. the last relationship i had was 4 years ago and it wasn’t even a real; one: i didn’t love him, two: i was just a young teenager who wanted someone to hold my hand, and three: we didn’t even go on dates or have meaningful conversations… there was no connection. i’m sick of of watching everybody i love find someone…and i know i sound like a stupid teenage girl when i say this but it’s not fair. i find that love isn’t shared around the world evenly; some people seem to have someone special in their lives all the time, where as others may only have a few or (like my case) none. i think it’s funny how my friends will come to me for love advice when in reality i have never truly loved anyone before or haven’t even dated a lot. i know i’m just jealous and acting stupid but i keep telling myself “the right one will come into your life soon, so don’t worry and just relax.” i’m sick of waiting for the right one. i think my problem is that i won’t date just anyone… “he needs to not be a horny teenage boy who just wants sex” but i know in reality there is no such thing. i think i might just go watch some uk skins or listen to stupid love songs. goodnight xx

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