We started dating a year and a half ago. The beginning to the middle was great. You were totally into me, as I was you. We started out spending 1 then 2, then 3, fast forward 6 days a week together. Then I begin to get too needy, or maybe you just stopped doing the things that attracted me to you in the first place. We used wrap ourselves up in eachother tickle fighting and laughing the night away. I remember on our first date we stayed up all night running around like goons and having laughs to last a life time.
Now, we downsized to 3 days a week to see if creating space would bring us closer together. Finding our own selves again so when we come back together we would appreciate it fully. I have one problem I cannot seem to get past though.
At night I am not allowed to touch you. We go to bed like strangers (on our 3 nights we spend together) and at some point in the night I reach my hand over to touch you, just rest a hand on your arm, and I hear a loud “UGHHH!” escape your lips. You used to crave to be near me in the night, curl into me and fall asleep easily. Now, you need your own space 100% to the point that if I reach out to lay a finger on you you tell me no. When I asked you about this and if you could try harder, you said this is who you are and during the night hours this is not going to change. May I ask, where is the spontaneity in this?
Who in their right mind wants to sleep next to their partner while forbidden to lay a hand on them? I am so sorry, but I cannot get past this. I understand you need your sleep, and by all means have it. But the fact that you won’t let me or WANT me near you in these hours whatsoever is heartbreaking to me. What changed? You say you get hot, but for 6 months straight the temperature never stopped you from coming to me. You say that in the beginning you were so starved for human contact that that is what you wanted, and now a year later that this is who you really are, and you tell me to accept this. The fact that this is a written down law, no touching at night, kills the buzz of love for me. Someone out there, am I crazy or is this reasonable? I’m not asking for a full on cling in the middle of the night, but when I reach out my hand its turned away.. all the time. Thoughts?