It’s embarrassing how much I think about you. The littlest things remind me of you and all the memories we created that year we were together. What we had was my first grown up relationship, and that’s why it’s so hard to let go.
We saw each graduate from college, we supported each other’s careers in the casino industry. You taught me about gambling, I taught you how to tweet. You were my first and last college sweetheart.
I admired and respected you for your intelligence, your integrity and the stability you provided in my hectic, chaotic life. We cuddled, had great conversations and shared some really meaningful intimate moments. I still lie in bed thinking about you, thinking about us, hoping (vainly) that our hearts will someday be on the same page.
I’m still bitter about our break up and how you’ll never be the kind of passionate, open hearted lover that I need. But even though it’s been difficult getting over you and I’d probably roll my eyes (then panic) and the sight of you, I want you to be happy.
Maybe someday it’ll be with me.
Your little baby.