• Who am I.

    by  • July 12, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Depression • 0 Comments

    I can’t talk openly with anyone so I guess that’s probably why I’m here writing this. I just feel so lost. Everything is ‘perfect’ in my life. Yet despite this, I’m still so unhappy. I appreciate what I have but I just can’t express happiness. No one really knows what I’m going through. And neither do I, really. I hate myself. After every word I speak, I hate myself even more.

    Mum, I do love you. I don’t mean to swear at you or call you horrible names. I would do anything for you, if only I knew how.

    Dad, I’m still your little girl. We never talk anymore. I can’t see why not. You were always my greatest support.

    Sister, You’re my best friend. I love you so much more than you realise. Why have we grown apart. Why is it that we fight over the most pathetic issues.

    My dearest boyfriend, You don’t deserve my constant mood swings. You are so cute and amazing. I really need to appreciate you more. You mean everything to me.

    I hate the words that come out of my mouth. I hate the way I treat the people I love most. Even at the happiest of times, I find it difficult to express how I’m feeling.

    I hope that someday soon I overcome this depression. I want to be a role model for my younger siblings. I don’t want them to see me like this.

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