For the next 99 days straight, I’m going to constantly become stronger, faster, more flexible and even better than my improved self as I did once before. During this training session, I’m going to become a lot more charming and confident in all of my abilities to a point that no one could fathom… essentially becoming less of the douchebag with a disclaimer and more of the romantic type. Who knows? Maybe I’ll even be a decent human being. I just want you to know that at the end of this project, I’m going to become someone you would want to date and I will be thinking of you when the time comes. Unfortunately for you, I will never let you have a chance with me after I ascend to my heightened state because if you wouldn’t accept me before, I wouldn’t dare let you anywhere near my heart when it is at its biggest. If you wish to redeem yourself, have your chance at me again, get to me before the end of September… or we could just be friends forever, which is what you always wanted before I become the best boyfriend you’ll never have.