• Regardless I love you

    by  • July 8, 2011 • Love - Pure and Simple • 0 Comments

    JP,

    They say “all good things in life must come to an end”. If this is so, what happens if it was never good to begin with? Do you wait for it to become good or continue pretending it’s something it’s not, therefore being good? If this life quote is true, however, does anyone really want anything to become wholesomely good? Personally I’d prefer something bad to end over something good. Basically, you and I, I would consider us bad, at least for me. You make me feel like the world stops when you hold me and that you and I are the only people in the room when we kiss, but the fact that I am not sure this is reciprocated back completely is what makes this bad. Whether it’s good or bad, either way, I will be devastated by its end. I don’t know when it will end, since technically it hasn’t even begun. More so than being devastated by its ending is the simple fact of me seemingly being the only one; 50% of us, that cares whether we start, last, end…whatever. I love you, I haven’t told you yet, but you may or may not know that anyway, although I’m quite sure neither one of us will speak of it knowledge or not. You play with me daily, pretty sure you don’t even know. You push me away, pull me back in, promise things, kiss me, hold me, fuck me, tell me you miss me, but does that make us good? I don’t know what to think anymore. I don’t chase guys, you are the first and I’m sure the last whether we make it or not, I can’t handle this again. Until our status changes, I will question everything about us, I will be insecure, is that what you want? You say you are doing this to be fair to me because you just don’t have the time during the summer for a girlfriend, but I just feel like you want to be free. If that’s what you want please tell me, I’d rather this end before it gets good. Regardless, I love you.

    Becca

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