• I Know I’ll Be Fine :)

    by  • July 8, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Letting Go, Waxing Poetic • 0 Comments

    A relationship is not truly over until all bonds are broken. And they’re not. I still feel a whirlwind of butterflies when I think of you. I still feel a warmth in my cheeks, a wild beating in my heart. Though you’ve left me behind yet again, I still haven’t left you behind.
    But I’ll never tell you that.

    My love was like a colorful artwork, a masterpiece you were too blind to see. My love was like a beautiful symphony you were too deaf to hear. My love was like the softest silk, the sweetest fruit, the most fragrant flower. You were just too much of a fool to see what you had. You don’t deserve me, now less than ever. I am the princess to your pauper, the sun to your sky. I am everything you never knew you needed. I don’t need you. I found that out every other time you left me like I was nothing. I know I’m special. I don’t need a crowd of admirers to tell me this every day as you do. I know I’m special because when I think of who I am and what I do, I would want to meet someone like that. I know I’m special, ____. I know I’m worth more than you made me feel I was.

    I selfishly hope you’ll miss me too. I selfishly hope that one day, you’ll grow up and see me for what I really am, what I’m really worth. I selfishly hope that you’ll compare everyone else you meet to me. I selfishly hope they’ll never actually compare. I selfishly hope you’ll regret ever leaving me. And yet, I selflessly wish you the best. I want your happiness, even if you never truly afforded mine.

    I’m not like you, ____. I love for the sake of loving. I love selflessly, truly, fully. I love with everything that I am, with everything I have. I trust blindly and faithfully. I am loyal to a fault. I effortlessly give all that I am. You took all that for granted. You loved me for what I gave you, what I did for you. You loved me for the benefits I brought to you. I loved you for who you were, what you were about. I loved you for everything I saw inside. I won’t regret spending four years of the most important part of my life with you. No, I won’t. It made me wiser, if nothing else. It made me stronger. More independent. I think I even helped you, a little. Maybe not as much as I like to think.
    I’m okay. I have two feet of my own to stand on, a head of my own to think with, and a heart of my own to feel with. I have everything I need here, even without you.

    In time, the butterflies will sleep, the warmth will subside, and the wild beating will slow. Until then, I will slowly think of you less and less. I will never forget how real my love for you was. But never will I forget who I am and what I’m worth.

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