Last night as I lay there looking up to the sky watching the Independence Day fireworks, you were close in mind and heart. For it is people like you that I was celebrating, the brave ones who put their personal lives aside to serve and protect our country.
Your message was relayed to me this morning. And you’re right, I do hear your heart screaming and I hope that you can still hear mine too, despite the physical distance between us. It is breaking my heart to hear how sad you are without me. I too, am sad without you my love, but I have to hide it. I have to put a smile on my face and pretend to be okay every day, even when I am not. It is exhausting. So when I am alone, I allow the smile to fade and let my heart feel the pain of your absence. Can you hear my cries?
I do truly believe that you are my soul mate, you are THE one, but I’m scared to take that leap of faith, so I stay here where I’m comfortable and safe. I’ve never fully admitted that to anyone, but I know that you know it’s true.
In my head, you are perfect, our love is perfect, and our lives together would be perfect. Despite how much we talked and how deep I believe our love truly is, we have been in each other’s company only a handful of times and there are lots of things that we do not know about each other. I’m afraid to leave my whole entire life behind to come there and be with you. If it turned out to be anything other than the perfect love that we have both only dreamed of, I would almost rather not know, and keep you and our love in my heart as a perfect thing. For if I do not have that, than I no longer believe in true love.