• First loves

    by  • July 6, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Love - Pure and Simple • 7 Comments

    Maybe I can’t forget you because you were my first love. You taught me HOW to love. You taught me the meaning of passion, tears, and love. Maybe this is why, even though I’m able to fall in love with another…a part of you will always stay with me. Because without you, I don’t know how to love. Our memories guide me, and taught me so many lessons about love and life, that I don’t know how I can be in love without your memory. And when I continue to get broken hearts on this road of life, I always go back to you. I can honestly say that I’m over you, because you have become a part of ME, and I have become a part of YOU. So if I was over you, I’d be over myself. If that makes any sense at all. On the surface I don’t care, on the surface Im seraching for another light to guide me. But deep, deep down inside myself there is a pull towards you and me together in the future. Not now, not then, but maybe someday. I’m living my life with choices that lead me further away from my first love. But yet using what he taught me to get there. So I’m running in circles. Is it possible to fall in love with another person anyways? Shouldn’t you stick with your first love? Isin’t that what love is about? Commitment and hard work? Either way, I fell in love with a boy who injected me with a poisoniness kind of love. A kind of toxin that my body will never get rid of. Maybe from now on, every time I fall in love with another, there love will be poisoned as well. From his leftover love. Its a blind, lustfull love that will drive you MAD. I’ve never felt such an addiction. But maybe, one thing I’ve learned, is that sometimes the “high” you get from love..isin’t the kind of love you want anyways. That kind of lustfull love isin’t there when the days go on, and passion runs out. Building a relationship on lust, is like building a house of paper. There nothing to keep it standing in the end. First loves are always build with stone and brick, because you are not afraid to give them your all. Maybe this is why your first love always stands by you, wherever you go. After your first broken heart, you can never fully give another person your everything. The deepest parts of you are left with your first love. You can’t get them back though. If you want to be the same person ever again you need to go back to that love. This is why so many people change after their first love. They have to rebuild themselves, because their other half is with another who stole their heart. I am stubborn, and not willing to change. Does this mean I’ll go searching for my old self? Or rebuild my life in order to fully love again? Maybe I’m just crazy.

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    7 Responses to First loves

    1. alicia
      July 26, 2013 at 7:20 pm



    2. Lover
      July 27, 2013 at 6:47 pm

      And then there are those who have been the first love of two others; both relationships failing at some point, but in the end, they end up with their own first love, depriving the other of that opportunity..

      Sentiments beautifully expressed and many of which I wholeheartedly agree with, but often tear me up inside at how I’ve potentially affected said second love…


    3. a reader
      January 2, 2014 at 3:36 pm



    4. Interesting trend we have....
      January 4, 2014 at 2:50 pm

      developing. The return to posts made 6-12 months ago.

      Huh? No one knows anyone one here ! (wink) Is this shooting in the dark?
      Now, humans do hae their own ‘communication styles’ which sometimes swing wildly from peron to person, Some people ‘act up’ to get attention while some smother and there is the group who actively push others to the brink as a test of “Will they [still] stay with me after this doozy?” .

      Others break up and are ‘not nice’ (vs alternate,descriptive terms available) and then wonder or ask, “Why didn’t you fight for me?” !!!!

      Makes me crazy. This could be likened to going to a zoo and hiring a monkey to be your money manager. employing the Throwing Darts Theory.

      Oddly enough, those known as ‘The Banana Bunch’ do consistently outperform professional investors, So the return to old posts DOES make some sense, despite the longstanding ‘herd mentality’ that “No one knows anyone here.”

      The most famous of all monkeys since 1980, Ronald Wilson Bonzo, the renowned hedge fund manager, was unavailable for comment on the matter.
      “Ronnie” as he is affectionately known, is rumored to be skiing in Europe with his family of chimps.

      But we have acquired some rare archival footage of a young Bonzo, who was so impressive in this demonstration that the top brass at Boston based Grantham Mayo, took a chance on him. They even built him a play cage. In his serious 15 minutes a day of concentrated work, he quickly proved to be a rising star.

      In other investment news, a public prediction on Facebook has another monkey from Dallas getting some accolades and attention from other top fund managers. In March of 2009, just two days after the Dow Jones reached a low of of 6547 he read a WSJ article titled, “Major sell signal issued from Wall Street Giant.” Given the chance of lifetime, knowing the market had bottomed, the gently aging monkey decided to challenge the best of the best. This was the end of a real beating, as 18 months earlier the Dow was over 14,100 and here was a window that comes once every 10 years.

      An astounding 48 hours from the absolute bottom, Monk, the nickname given to him by his followers, published that WSJ article along with the following public warning,

      “These guys don’t know what they are talking about.” He added “If the Dow reaches 6600 within a week, this is THE bottom of the market. You can write it on the wall.”

      The Dow is currently at the 15,600 mark.
      Moral of the story? Don’t judge a monkey on what he says. Judge them by their track records.



    5. D
      January 5, 2014 at 1:43 am

      I love monkeys. Especially of the sock variety.


    6. tricia
      January 5, 2014 at 12:20 pm

      monkey see monkey do theory.. ya left that out


    7. Lol@tricia
      January 5, 2014 at 7:07 pm

      My imagination believes ‘I got ‘ your joke.
      Praise be to subtle humor




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