Maybe I can’t forget you because you were my first love. You taught me HOW to love. You taught me the meaning of passion, tears, and love. Maybe this is why, even though I’m able to fall in love with another…a part of you will always stay with me. Because without you, I don’t know how to love. Our memories guide me, and taught me so many lessons about love and life, that I don’t know how I can be in love without your memory. And when I continue to get broken hearts on this road of life, I always go back to you. I can honestly say that I’m over you, because you have become a part of ME, and I have become a part of YOU. So if I was over you, I’d be over myself. If that makes any sense at all. On the surface I don’t care, on the surface Im seraching for another light to guide me. But deep, deep down inside myself there is a pull towards you and me together in the future. Not now, not then, but maybe someday. I’m living my life with choices that lead me further away from my first love. But yet using what he taught me to get there. So I’m running in circles. Is it possible to fall in love with another person anyways? Shouldn’t you stick with your first love? Isin’t that what love is about? Commitment and hard work? Either way, I fell in love with a boy who injected me with a poisoniness kind of love. A kind of toxin that my body will never get rid of. Maybe from now on, every time I fall in love with another, there love will be poisoned as well. From his leftover love. Its a blind, lustfull love that will drive you MAD. I’ve never felt such an addiction. But maybe, one thing I’ve learned, is that sometimes the “high” you get from love..isin’t the kind of love you want anyways. That kind of lustfull love isin’t there when the days go on, and passion runs out. Building a relationship on lust, is like building a house of paper. There nothing to keep it standing in the end. First loves are always build with stone and brick, because you are not afraid to give them your all. Maybe this is why your first love always stands by you, wherever you go. After your first broken heart, you can never fully give another person your everything. The deepest parts of you are left with your first love. You can’t get them back though. If you want to be the same person ever again you need to go back to that love. This is why so many people change after their first love. They have to rebuild themselves, because their other half is with another who stole their heart. I am stubborn, and not willing to change. Does this mean I’ll go searching for my old self? Or rebuild my life in order to fully love again? Maybe I’m just crazy.