• Did you think of us?

    by  • July 6, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Those Gone Before Us • 0 Comments

    When you left,
    did you think of us?
    Any of us at all?

    Did you think of my older brother… your best friend since you were old enough to have friends?
    How sad you were when he left that lawn-care job you guys had together,
    To move onto something better?

    Before you turned around and left this life,
    to move onto something better.

    Did you think of my dad… cooking you organic buffalo burgers,
    and how you’d smile with your mouth-full,
    nod like it wasn’t the blandest, most tasteless thing you’d ever eaten?
    Nobody pretended to like his cooking.
    He loved you for that.

    What about my little brother?
    Who’d go to all your high school football games and follow you around the house,
    begging you to play video games with him?
    He wanted to grow up to be just like you.
    Until you decided never to grow up at all.

    Did you think of my mom, or yours? Your grandparents, your sisters..

    Did you think of me?
    Loving you since I was 6 years old,
    Blushing every time you said my name,
    Daydreaming that one day I’d be more than just your best friend’s little sister.

    Did you think of me?
    Because I’ve thought of you,
    Your troubled, sparkling eyes and handsome crooked smile.
    Your cool, understated sense of humor.
    Your desire to make everything right in everyone else’s world,
    When nothing was right in yours.

    Did you think of me?
    Because I’ve thought of you,
    Every day since you left.
    Every minute since I came home to my family huddled around in the kitchen, crying.
    Every second since my brother looked me in the eyes and said,
    “It’s Rich… he’s dead. He shot himself.”

    Because I’ve thought of you,
    Thought of you ending one pain with the blow of another.
    Thought of you buried deep beneath the cold, hard ground..
    That handsome face never to put a flutter in another girls’ heart again.
    Thought of every single one of us that you left behind.
    And how we’ll be thinking of you every day until we join you up there.

    But I still can’t help but wonder,

    When you left,
    Did you think of us?
    Any of us at all?

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