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    by  • July 6, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Disappointment • 0 Comments

    dear connor,

    i would like to start this off by saying that anything i do or say that is irrational can be blamed on the hormonal imbalance due to my period.

    so. we just got off the phone. i was trying really hard to sound mad. i guess you didn’t notice because you still hung up. or you just didn’t care. don’t want to bother the other two people huh.

    there is just something so frustrating about you. you make me want to hit you and slap you and make you cry. that sounds so awful. but its terribly true.

    i know you have ADHD. and i know it’s the way you are. you are forgetful and sometimes don’t see things i think are obvious. i’m too mean to you sometimes. i wouldn’t suspect you to have a naive or innocent side but i think you do.

    i get really jealous. remember when we would talk before we were dating? and you would tell me about how much you liked that girl and how much you did for her? yeah. i was jealous then. because i thought you would be a great boyfriend.

    and you are. emotionally (and physically). but i fantasize about a boy who will do sweet things for me. who will listen to me when i tell him to stop tickling me. who won’t run away and disappear when we’re hanging out and make me call him on a pay phone only to have him ask me why i disappeared.

    i know you’ve been spending a lot of your birthday money on me. but honestly, i don’t even care. i would rather have you not spend a cent but make me something. a certain something. a certain something you made for your previous 2 ex-girlfriends. a certain something i made you for YOUR birthday but you haven’t listened to yet.

    a mix cd. please. i beg you. just one. just make me feel like i’m the most special girl ever. just for one day.

    of course i don’t actually want to ask you to do this. because i know you don’t like to say no and it will definitely not be the same.

    can you please do something to make me feel like i matter to you? you kiss and tug at me when we’re together, but this is just annoying. i don’t want you to smother me with physical affection. no. this proves how unimportant a kiss or a hug is now.

    god i feel so mad at you. you aren’t the boyfriend i thought you were. and i don’t think i want to hang out with you tomorrow anymore.

    being alone is bad. i realize that. but i feel under appreciated and inferior. not to mention i’m more insecure than ever right now and i don’t like this.

    so get your act together. because i don’t know how much more i can stand.


    your hormonal girlfriend who’s bleeding.

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