Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
I remember like it was yesterday. Cold October, you walked into my class. I thought nothing of you, didn’t find you particularly attractive. I had someone else and was perfectly content in my own world. Why did you walk through that door. Why that class, that quarter, that time? I began seeing you more and more frequently, from parties to around campus. Our lives seemed to be more intertwined than we expected. Then a facebook add. The quarter came and went, but we continued talking. Hanging out over break. Festivities. Meaningless hangouts began to mean more and more. A confession. You like me. I responded with what was not in my heart, because I knew I liked you back. It couldn’t be. Our Utopian break of deep conversation, spontaneous adventures, I was on cloud 9. What some would call love I brushed off as insignificant. A kiss, most passionate of my life. Best kisser. Your touch made me quiver, and nobody could push my buttons the way you could. As fast as it came, it went. You took all my feelings of joy, utter bliss out of the door. A few insignificant conversations were held out of pity, and that’s it.
How could something so great end so abruptly? How could I not have taken that feeling and ran with it, embracing it with everything I had, telling you I loved you? You took an inch, I ran a mile. Now drowning in a pool of regret half a year later, I am letting you go. Letting the feelings go, letting my regret go. I will learn from this and find someone who can embrace my love and share my utopia. I apologize for playing games, not giving my all to you. That was not in my intentions and I hope you realize what we had, was real to me. More real than any reality I have ever experienced. Thank you for introducing me to feelings I never knew could be real. I wish you every happiness this summer. Your gravitational pull will be lifted from my being when I hit publish, and I will find someone to give my whole heart to.