• Please Not Again

    by  • July 2, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Fear • 1 Comment


    I am so scared for school to start. You’ll be leaving for Lexington and I’ll still be stuck here in Cincinnati. It doesn’t seem like a long distance, but with each of us working and taking 18 credit hours worth of classes… I just don’t know how we’ll get to see each other.

    You have such a tiny attention span. Our relationship’s length has been record breaking for you because you can’t keep from getting bored with a girl for longer than a month. Until you met me, that is. I can’t help but feel some pride in that. I was so proud to hear you say that you loved me, that you consider me your fourth (fifth?) girlfriend, but your first love. But what happens when you can’t see me? When you can’t hold me or do our silly puffer-fish routine? Will you still love me when I’m not a constant presence in your life?

    The last time a guy left me for college, I never saw him again.

    I’m replaying this scenario over and over again in my head. I want to hit the pause button. I want to stay in this point in our relationship, when we’re happy. When we’re together. I’m too scared to let the scene play because I know how it ends.

    Please surprise me. Please don’t make me relive this again.

    Please don’t forget me.

    One Response to Please Not Again

    1. Sympathizer
      July 2, 2011 at 7:56 pm

      I hate the feeling you described. It’s heavy and scary. But things may work out differently this time. Have hope.

    Leave a Reply