• you never came back

    by  • July 1, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Lost Love • 0 Comments

    You were the most beautiful creature I ever beheld. Everything about you screams beauty- screams innocence. How I swore I could handle any obstacle in the world except being on bad terms with you, or when we’d fight. Fire and water. Sometimes I could make you ignite. Sometimes I put out your fire, and sometimes I drowned in my own sea of thoughts; thinking it would never be reciprocated the same. Your face and back dimples, and your icey blue almost unreachable distant eyes. I liked how I could never figure you out completely- how you remained a mystery to me until you came out of your shell when our bodies were finely intertwined, sweating- I was breathing you in and you were breathing me in. You drove me crazy before and now you drive my crazy now, and I wonder when you will finally leave my mind, and give me the pieces of myself I left with you. All your beautiful flaws that meshed with all of mine. Your immense passion for music and how you lit up every time you heard a soulful song. Left brained vs. right brained, and logic and intellectualness vs. creativeness and opened-mindedness- it was never boring…I would be lying to myself if I told people I didn’t still love you. You make me want to scream, and pause the world so I can walk up to you and kiss you, and feel you and your warmth around me again. I want to punch you, to drag you back into my life so I can feel normal again. I want to scream I love you and I hate you to your face all at the same time. I love you for staying true to yourself, and I hate you for not giving me a second chance, when I know I deserve one. All I ever do is reminisce, trace back to the finger prints you left on my body, the toll it took on my sanity, and the identity I once had. All I ever do is compare all my sexual experiences to that of those with you. You will always be my fire, aries.

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