Give all to love
Emerson told me;
“Give all to love;
Obey thy heart;
Friends, kindred, days,
Estate, good fame,
Plans, credit, and the muse;
‘Tis a brave master,
Let it have scope,
Follow it utterly,
Hope beyond hope
And I listened. I cry out I gave it all! I gave it all! I gave you everything. I offered you whatever you wanted. I said should I move? I will move for you darling. Should we run off and travel as you have long talked about – let us go, let us go now!
I opened up my heart to you after you nearly destroyed my soul once. I told myself love was strong – and everyone makes mistakes. But then you did it again. You slept with someone else. Not sex you said, just sleep. But how could I believe a word you say anymore? Lie after lie after lie. I grew so weary trying to figure out the truth. I screamed to you that not on the phone – WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! But it’s true – who do you think you are, that you can treat people this way?
You dropped me off on a street corner with my bags – trying to get rid of me like an unwanted dog.
I am a human.
I feel the need to say it again, I am a person.
You are words. You are lies. That is all you are and ever will be.
I am terrified of you, because what are you, human at all?
Can humans really do this to other humans?
I am terrified of you.
I am more than words. Watch me. Watch me grow up in pictures and comments on facebook. Watch me travel the world – while you rot in that shithole. While you lay in a cesspool of all the dreams you didn’t have the balls to go after.
I will learn to love again. I will give it everything again. It might be years, but I will love again. I will continue giving whatever I have to love, because there is nothing else.
I will even love you. Because I am love. I will not carry anger, I will leave it here on this page. I will love you. I will strive to love all.
I will give it all to love.