• Don’t make my mistake.

    by  • June 28, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Moving On • 2 Comments

    Dear L.I.N.S. readers,

    I have something to tell you, all of you who are confused and broken and frustrated.

    I was with someone who I thought I was going to marry. I was fully convinced that he was the one I was meant to be with. We even had our closest friends believing that we were that one special couple that wouldn’t ever be apart. However, they were deceived, as was I. He had us all fooled. I sincerely and whole heartedly loved him. It took me quite a while to get there, but when I fell, I fell really hard. The horrible part is, as soon as he had me, all of me, I lost him. He didn’t care anymore. He didn’t put in any effort to see me, be with me, talk to me, or love me like he should. I felt like a burden, and I still think I was. He was borderline physically abusive, but I acted like it was just his version of joking around. Looking back, I realize that that behavior was not okay. Hurting a girl, in any violent way, is NOT okay. I don’t care if he was a black belt and wrestled with his brothers or whatever, I’m not a punching bag, and no girl ever should be. I warned him over and over that If he hit me just one more time, I would break up with him. I could never follow through with my threat. I was SO unbelievably attached to him, and it’s all because I lost my virginity to him. He didn’t invest in our relationship at all, and I gave him EVERYTHING. My heart, my body, my future. It meant nothing to him in the end. It was worth the price of one text message to end it all. God, how was I so stupid? Why did I think that he was IT?! Ugh. I feel so bad for every girl who is in a relationship where they aren’t getting treated the way they should. With Tyler, I convinced myself that he was all I was ever going to get and no one would ever want me besides him so I might as well just suck it up and deal with it. I was so lonely. I can’t begin to tell you how many nights I fell asleep with a wet pillow and a broken heart, while we were still together. My friends, that is not how a relationship should be.

    I’m with someone else now. Someone perfect for me. Absolutely, positively wonderful. because of him, I now see how a man is supposed to treat a woman. I see respect, honor, chivalry, thoughtfulness, purpose, and genuine love in all of his actions. Our relationship isn’t one sided. It’s give and take and unconditional love. I have never been so happy in my whole life, and I’m so grateful that I had the strength to move on, I just wish I had gone sooner.

    Do not settle. Do not think that the current relationship you are in is all you can get. I promise you that someone perfect will come for you and make every other person seem ridiculously insignificant. He or she will rock your world and flip it upside down. Until then, have faith. Don’t give yourself to someone who’s not worth you or your precious love.

    A <3

    2 Responses to Don’t make my mistake.

    1. Stephanie
      June 28, 2011 at 3:29 pm

      Thanks. I hope so.

    2. jessica
      June 28, 2011 at 6:39 pm

      your letter gave me a sense of amazing hope. lately i’ve been feeling SO lonely and sad because a lot of my friends who are younger than me are getting married. i’ve only kissed one guy. i’m nowhere near a great relationship, but your letter made me see that it’s possible. i’m so happy for you! i hope one day i can also feel the sense of happiness that you do with someone as equally amazing as the guy you have. treasure your love!

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