I’m really sorry that I subconsciously hate you and therefore just basically murdered you when I was trying to remove all hair from your surface. The wax didn’t work, so what was I supposed to do?? Just let it be all patchy? I had to shave after I waxed…so I’m sorry. You just never fucking come out right.
P.S. I don’t actually hate you, I just hate your hair because you have A LOT of bad hair days.
P.P.S. In fact, I love you, so all I’m asking is for you to try just a littleeeee harder next time.
All right, LOVE,