• I’m About To Jump On You

    by  • June 25, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Short -n- Sweet • 4 Comments

    I’m probably 30 pounds heavier than you,
    you skinny ass twig,
    but I don’t care.
    We’re playing Mario Kart

    on your bed
    in your dorm room

    and you ran over me with Yoshi
    so now I’m telling you you’re about to get it
    and you don’t even know that I’m 100% serious

    because your arm is touching mine
    and I smell your obnoxious “Dark Temptation” crap cologne
    and I hate myself because it actually turns me on,

    like just-jizzed-my-pants status,

    and your mocking my choice of Princess Peach
    thinking you’re hot shit because you can beat me on Rainbow Road
    but don’t you worry
    I’m about to rock you so hard
    you jizz star power.

    4 Responses to I’m About To Jump On You

    1. Kanna
      June 25, 2011 at 10:46 pm

      Fuck yes! This is so boss.

    2. Kelsey
      June 26, 2011 at 2:31 am

      Brightened. My entire. Fucking. Night.

    3. Darling
      June 26, 2011 at 9:19 pm


    4. somegirl
      June 27, 2011 at 1:14 pm

      LMAO. awesome

    Leave a Reply