• Words I’ll Never Say

    by  • June 1, 2011 • * Safe for Work *, Love - Pure and Simple • 1 Comment

    I think I’ve come to realize that I’ll never be able to tell you how I truly feel…how I’ve felt for the past 7 years…how I will probably always feel. Because I know that you don’t feel the same way. You messed with my heart and head for 4 years, teasing me, making me fall in love with you only to find out that you would never have those same feelings with me. Yet, even through those 4 years I never once said out loud how I felt. Never. And now I know that I never will.

    Somehow you can’t let me go. You can’t let me move on. You live across the country yet somehow whenever you’re home you con me into falling right back to where I was. I am fine, normal, healthy when you aren’t here. But you confuse me! You are single for 2 years, and then ask me to be your date to your sister’s wedding. Yet, nothing happened. We celebrated your birthday with our two families together while in Africa and I know there was a moment, but you walked away.

    So I’ve finally come to accept that I will never tell you how I feel. Because simply, I know that you have and will never feel the same way. And thats alright. I guess we make better friends anyways.

    But just so you know…I love you. I’ve loved you since I was 15 and will always love you. I wish I could tell you…but I know I can’t. So just one more time, here in this letter, I’ll say it. I love you P. I love you.

    Sincerely, your best friend

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    One Response to Words I’ll Never Say

    1. AnimaElectri
      June 16, 2017 at 4:56 am

      Your eyes haunt me still. In my thoughts and dreams. There was a time where I craved to look into those hazel jewels in person. My heart would race at the thrill of the thought. Although I’ll admit with you my skill in romance felt inept, so all I did was be myself. That’s all I could do…and it worked for me. I couldn’t explain the emotion. Something in between the feeling of seeing a flash of lightning and falling. Made my stomach tickle and knot. But where did I go wrong. Was I too slow? Did I say something wrong? I wish I could go back and stayed strong for you…stayed there. But I ended up becoming another one those selfish friends didn’t I? I’m sorry. You will always have a special place in my heart, you will always have that part of me. As little as my words must mean now, these are the ones I will never send. I think I fell in love with an Idea of you, and in doing so I thought I knew you…but I was wrong. I could have done better with you.



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