• A brief history of why you lost me.

    by  • May 14, 2011 • Frustration, The Ex • 0 Comments

    Dear X,

    Lets take a brief walk through our relationship, shall we?

    Long distance, and we had never even had our first kiss, we were together for 6 months. Everything was peachy until I went to Greece. You consistently forgot our skype dates. Shitty to do to someone you love, isnt it? I digress. I came back, you went abroad again. We couldnt talk because of your location. It killed me. You came back, and we were happy as two birds of a feather. Until I realized that I wasnt just dating you, I was dating all your friends too. I had to beg you to hang out with me one on one, and eventually beg you to have sex with me. You made me feel like shit. Like a booty call.

    We broke up.

    I told you I didnt want to, but that I would get over it. And i was doing a good job of just that until you started ignoring me like a fucking child. Me without the person I had been closest to for over a year absolutely tortured me. So eventually we started talking again. Then, we became friends. Things were good. Until this past weekend. You tried to kiss me. You told me how great it was that we were close again. You told me how healthy our new friendship was.

    That’s where you were wrong.

    You were treating me in such a way that people asked if we were back together. Boys were afraid to dance with me cause they didnt want to provoke anything. It absolutely fucked with my head.

    You say you’re getting your shit together? Take some fucking accountability for your actions. You know me well enough to know that this would absolutely fuck with my psyche.

    This isn’t a game, you asshole.

    I get that you’re leaving and all that, but that is NO excuse to dance the line between being my friend and being my boyfriend, especially when I KNOW YOU’RE FUCKING SOMEONE ELSE.
    Do not give boys I dance with dirty looks.
    Do not try to stick up for me when you’re friends fuck around with me.
    Do not try to kiss me.
    Do not stand with your arm around me.
    Do not tell me how much I changed you.
    If you did these things and were genuine about it, you would want me back. But I know you dont. Because you are too fucking stupid to know the best thing that ever happened to you if she slapped you in the face (and mark my words, I will.) Dont for one second think that you could have changed all these things about yourself if I hadn’t constantly tried to help you be this person.

    But do not, above all else, think that you broke my heart.

    Been there, done that, got that t-shirt. You’re not that good. You make me feel like shit. Like Im not someone worth coming back to. Like I was the one that fucked up. Like I was the one who threw this all away. You never knew how to treat me to make me fall head over heels in love with you, and so, I didnt. I just cared enough to want to work things out with you, but again, apparently I was the only one who cared. I told you I wasn’t going anywhere and I would always be your friend, but after this, I guess you’re not the only one who lied.

    Fuck you very much,
    Me

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