• The abyss

    by  • May 12, 2011 • Abuse, Depression • 3 Comments

    It is hard for me to let go. Sometimes, I just want to spill everything inside of me on the floor in a mess of memories and pain and sadness and maybe some happy times. I don’t remember happy times.

    It’s just incredibly frustrating to not have anyone understand. I was sexually abused, I was hit, I was forced to do things no child should ever do. I knew the intricate details of my parent’s sex lives when I was seven.

    The days are coming more and more where the only thing I want to do is stand over an overpass and let myself fall.

    3 Responses to The abyss

    1. RW
      May 12, 2011 at 9:12 pm

      You’re not alone, or the only person that has happened to. Luckily, neither you or I will ever have to relive those experience. Don’t let them ruin your life.

    2. If It Helps
      May 12, 2011 at 9:22 pm

      If it helps we could do it together. These are the days I feel like jumping most. I was abused as well and it is coming to a point where it is time to jump now or find help. We could do that last part together.

    3. Isaac
      May 12, 2011 at 9:32 pm

      There are those who experience the world through dirty windows; who are forced to bear the burdens of evil without a voice to plead “no!” Those who feel damaged, flawed, or tainted from experiences they never wanted, and worst of all…feel that because of their past, there is no point for their future. You have the right to feel sad, the right to be angry for what happened to you, but know that it will not last because you will not let it overcome you in the end. Do not feel trapped within walls too high to scale–but feel free to soar above all that holds you down now. You more than anyone else deserve happiness, and you WILL find it when you let go of the anger and resentment you may feel today. You deserve to feel the way you do because what happened was not FAIR! But what you deserve may not be what you need. Let go of your pain. Let go of your sadness. And give it to this world to deal with for you. Find that one person who can help you walk when you stumble now, and rely on those who have the strength to support you, because you will be okay and your burden will be lifted off all shoulders never again to harm you or anyone else again. And you will find what you’re looking for in life one day. When that day comes you will be strong, and wise, and compassionate, and YOU will have the strength to help another who is in need. But for now, have hope and seek those who you can trust to take care of you. For we all need help, some more than others, and we shall find it in the love we have within ourselves.

    Leave a Reply