• I’m sorry there’s nothing I can do but love you

    by  • March 21, 2011 • Love - Pure and Simple, Sorry • 12 Comments

    I know you’re hurting. You’ve been hurting badly for a long time.

    You’re not just my girlfriend, you’re my best friend in all the world and I’m sorry there’s nothing I can do. I can’t make the scars or the worries or the nightmares go away. I can’t make you want to live. All I can do is be here and hold you when you want me to and I’m sorry. I’m so damn sorry.

    I wasn’t there when you wanted me in the beginning. I’m sorry for that as well. I know there’s no way I could have known but I’m sorry all the same.

    You mean more to me than I ever thought anyone could and I know I don’t show it hard enough or often enough or deeply enough. I know I’m a terrible person and I know I need to stop being so fucking scared. I’m sorry. I know I make you feel guilty like a ‘burden’ but none of this is your fault.

    I’m sorry I can’t keep my mouth shut when I’m afraid and I ruin things by making them worse. I’m sorry I’m so much less than you deserve because you are beautiful and damaged and fragile and I’m an idiot who doesn’t understand.

    I’m sorry people have hurt you and I wish I could show you I’m not going to do the same. I’m sorry I can’t open up my heart and my mind and show you how much I love you.

    Most of all, I’m sorry for apologising all the time. Maybe I should stop fucking up so much. I love you.

    12 Responses to I’m sorry there’s nothing I can do but love you

    1. S.
      March 21, 2011 at 11:25 am

      …and maybe you should tell her just that instead of posting it in here. tell her or just print and give this to her! No doubt she will love to know this. Just jump and love.

    2. John Doe
      June 29, 2011 at 12:49 pm

      I broke my g/f heart 3 years ago, and she says she has stayed with me because she cares about me but no longer loves me. It was only 1 month ago where she seemed to put her foot down hard, and wants space between us, as she keeps reminding me of the broken heart I gave her 3 years ago.

      How can I heal her heart so we stay together?

    3. Thinking
      June 29, 2011 at 2:01 pm

      @John Doe: You can’t heal anybody’s heart. She has to make a decision to let go of what you did that hurt her. It is as simple as that.

    4. anon
      June 29, 2011 at 3:03 pm

      Love doesn’t just disappear! Maybe it never really was…many emotions are often confused with love. You can not heal her to love you but if you feel this is the one and only, ever, for you? Tell her what you wrote in here, jump over your fear and open up to show who you really are. You will only win! Either to find that indeed she loves you too or that it wasn’t meant to be. Which then will set you free to find what will be yours forever.

    5. John Doe
      June 30, 2011 at 1:33 pm

      Big thing is she was married before, and her ex was a total abuser and hurt her bad. I promised not to ever hurt her, but I am human, and I had a bad night. I’ve never done anything since, but she claims she’s been hurt twice and is done.

      I am always there for her and her kids. I change my schedule to do whatever she needs so I can help her. I mean, although she is the most independent person I have ever met, she is also on the stubborn side with regards to accepting help. I love to help her and show her how I feel towards her, maybe even sometime smother her, though not intended.

      Anyhow, yes, I want this girl. Just do not know how to get her past this hurt thing. She wants ‘good friends’. I cannot do that given the way I feel towards her. The way she treats me has changed, she does not even want to get close anymore, though I still treat her the same.

      Maybe I’m in denial, but I just do not believe she has lost all feelings towards me, when at one time we spoke of marriage.

    6. John Doe
      July 1, 2011 at 1:00 pm

      I’ve been thinking, I may jut buy her a ring. Rather than giving it to her in person and giving her all that pressure. I may leave it on her dresser while she is sleeping with a very short note telling her my feelings for her, and letting her know that I am not forcing her to get married, but just asking to be with her.

      I will put in the letter that I will not accept the ring back. But if she says ‘no’, then where does that leave me. Basically I’ve lost and in that case I’ll feel like moving out of this area, away from her.

    7. anon
      July 1, 2011 at 4:54 pm

      Listen! You can NOT heal a relationship by getting married, it will only make it worth. Maybe not right away but over time. So safe yourself the heartache, and her. If you have hurt her physically, know! there is no excuse and stating that are are human in that fashion almost made me throw up a little in my mouth. This is a mental problem and needs attention. The kind of attention that MOST men can not control without professional help. If she had a abusive relationship before, she knows it. Hence her withdraw. Heal yourself before you try to heal/help someone else and I don’t mean this to sound harsh or judgmental. I am sincerely concerned for you. Forgive me if I interpreted your words incorrectly though!

    8. sarah
      July 1, 2011 at 5:01 pm

      @ John Doe. buy her the ring. It will show you mean it, and the idea sounds beautiful

    9. John Doe
      July 5, 2011 at 8:44 pm

      Well, she has been on this ‘friend’ thing for a couple of weeks now. I mean, we’ll be doing something, either at her place, or at the gym, or whatever, and she’ll make at least one attempt to state that we are just ‘good friends’, for whatever reason. Maybe it makes her feel more in control to be able to say that.

      But this cannot go on. I may be in denial, but I just cannot believe that this is all done. I never hurt her physically, just once emotionally. But, it was more than 3 years ago, I deserve a second chance. I’ve done nothing but prove to her how much I love her and what a mistake it was.

      I mean, the presents, and cute gifts, the flowers, the food, that is not doing it. So, maybe giving her some space is a good idea, but I wish I knew if doing that would bring us closer…….

      She does not know it, but I set up a trust for her kids, and a life insurance on myself. Maybe I should tell her, let her know how much I care?

      Give her the ring, maybe. But that is kind of a ‘yes or no’ and if she says no……….

    10. John Doe
      July 8, 2011 at 6:52 am

      July 4th: We are at the park watching the fireworks and she is lying on my lap. Do friends do that? We were holding hands. Do friends do that? Then later she lays the ‘friend’ thing on me again.

      Seems like she wants to make the decision as to when and what the relationship is. It is driving me nuts.

    11. Vivian
      December 31, 2012 at 7:32 pm

      So what happened?

      From this short thread of comments, I’ve gotten attached to this story, and maybe I can relate -the tiniest bit- to John.

      Are you happy now, John Doe?

    12. Sassy
      July 28, 2014 at 2:54 am

      So you going to leave us on the edge of our seats,what did you do,are you together as a couple what????

    Leave a Reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *