• hardly a love/hate relationship

    by  • December 19, 2010 • Disappointment, Grief, Heartbreak, Love - Pure and Simple, Yearning for You • 0 Comments

    i hate how disappointed i am when i don’t hear from you all day, i hate that i compare you to other guys and when i do i feel let down, i hate how awkward you make me feel when one of the guys brings something up about your past, i hate that i hear from insignificant guys more times a day than i hear from you in a week, i hate that you lie to me and i have to force myself not to trust you, i hate that you make me feel pathetic, i hate hearing my friends tell me i’m crazy for being with you, i hate how you harass me about my past while i just accept you for the things you’ve done, i hate when people ask me if we’re dating and i don’t know the answer, i hate how you tell me such great things and never seem to mean them, i hate how you can make me so sad, i hate that you always put your friends before me, and you don’t ever seem to want to be alone with me, i hate second guessing myself with you, i hate how you wont make compromises for me, i hate how i’m your girl only when its convenient for you, i hate the nights i wait around for you and the nights i ditch everything to be with you. i hate that even though i’m aware of all the things i hate about you, the things i love about you always seem to compensate. i love the way you sing, and when you look me in the eyes with that crooked smile on your face, i love when you tell me to lay on top of you, and when you kiss my fire-camp hair or my feet, i love how your an amazing son and brother, i love it when you open up to me and do things that i can tell you do with no one else, i love how easily you pick up a habit, and how you constantly look for approval, i love how you make me laugh and how you’ve stuck around for almost a year, even if it is at your own convenience. i love when you drink too much and act a fool and how you feel so bad about it afterwards, it drives me crazy when you tell me you love kissing me, or how i see a side of you no one else knows, i love your body and how you dont know your sexy, i love how you can admit your faults and that you always care about the feelings of others, i love how you let me wake you up multiple times a night just to tell you something stupid, i love that you remind me of home and that i always feel safe when i’m with you, love that you know i’ve been hurt in the past, and try to treat me better because of it, i love that your second language is mechanics and how you always keep me coming back for more, i love how hard you work and the decisions you make on impulse, i love how you kept the note i wrote you, i love when you love being with me, i love that you make it impossible for me to “ignore” you for more than 10 minutes, i love how you call me out on my stupid games, i love how you always ask me to sleep over, and how when i’m with you it’s like there’s no one else, i love how you notice the smallest things about me, and how you let me introduce you to new things, i love us and i love how you know i love you even though i’m too scared to say it.

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