• Long Day.

    by  • November 9, 2010 • Confusion, Friends, Interested?, Love - Pure and Simple, Thoughts, Yearning for You • 0 Comments

    This website lends support to my bipolar tendencies. my mood doesn’t have to be consistent at all because no one will ever know.

    I was in the library from 1:30pm to 10pm. That’s 9 and a half hours if my brain isn’t too fried to do math.

    As I was walking home with my hood up, walking at a brisk pace because it’s starting to feel wintry, I was thinking to myself, one of my favorite things to do, and these are some of the thoughts that I had.

    Initially, I thought I should write a letter to each individual person in my life to explain why I am the way I am. Upon further thought, I don’t need to explain myself to anyone, and I think this proudly.

    You are frustrating, unpredictable, cocky and arrogant. But I’m pretty sure I love you. Last night you told me that I do really well putting up with your shit, but I’m not going to put up with it much longer.

    I am a girl, and I just want to have fun.

    From sitting in the library so long, I’m pretty sure my muscles started the beginning stages of atrophying, but at least I wrote 11 out of the total 23 pages due before Thanksgiving break.

    Last night, after you left. My roommate said that while I was in the bathroom, you asked her if I hated you. How could you possibly think that. Am I really that good at hiding my emotions? Or are you just completely oblivious? I thought just to be nice, I would send you a text while you were on your way home to tell you just a tiny piece of how I feel.

    You didn’t respond.

    Maybe that’s why I think you’re an asshole sometimes.

    Especially because as you’re leaving and I’m hugging you goodbye, you squeeze me extra tight and tell me you don’t want to wait so long to see me again.

    You’re more confusing than I am…

    in the most frustratingly hopeful way possible.

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