Sometimes it just gets to be too much for me.
I hate how I tend to take on others problems, how all of my friends are all clinically depressed. It gets to me. It’s hard seeing one of your closests friends getting drunk and almost jumping out a window, being the one to pull him back in, it’s hard. It’s hard to keep caring.
More it’s not just one person that is pushing their problems on me, it’s multiple. One has an eating disorder and a blood disease, another is just so emtionally fragile that one small things sends her on a downward spiral. I’m getting to the end of my rope. It’s hard to keep caring, and that makes me feel so fucking selfish. It’s hard to be strong all the time, it’s hard to try to be happy all the time with all of your problems dragging me down.
I don’t know what to do, I don’t know if I can even keep doing this. I swear you guys are going to make me go down the same road. I want to help you I really do, but I’m not even sure if I’m going to be able to. You all need to just calm down, take a step back and look at how you are affecting everyone else. It’s almost dangerous. I know that one of you is getting help, or at least I hope you went to that doctors appointment, you’re my brother, I love you to bits.
But please stop making me feel so useless.