• too late.

    by  • September 22, 2010 • * Safe for Work *, Heartbreak, Love - Pure and Simple, Regret, Yearning for You • 0 Comments

    Dear Scott,

    The very first time I saw you, I had never expected to feel this way.

    Those few seconds I was able to see you each week became the highlight of my life. Every time you talked to me, I was way past cloud nine, I felt invincible. Of all the people I’ve ever met in my entire life, I can honestly say that no one else could make me feel like this. I would get literally sick to my stomach in anticipation.

    When people talked about “getting butterflies”, I thought I knew the feeling, but now, I really know. Everything I felt before you seemed so dull. I’d wait for hours just to catch a glimpse of your face. My entire being ached to tell you how I felt, but I was simply too insecure, too shy, too afraid of rejection.

    You are the most beautiful boy I have ever laid eyes upon. The most charming person I’ve met, and one of the most genuinely good hearted people I’ve come across. Everything a girl could possibly want. My last day there, I wanted to cry. I had thought and rethought what I would say to you before I couldn’t. I waited and waited, but you weren’t there that day. Completely torn apart inside, I was actually becoming physically ill. It broke my heart that I couldn’t see you one last time and finally get everything off my chest.

    No one, and I really mean no one, has ever affected me that much. All the things I wish I said to you, I had to continue to keep inside.

    Now it’s too late, and nothing’s worse than too late. You’ve raised my standards so high, that it’s become extremely difficult for me to find anyone else. No one else is good enough now, and I still can’t stop thinking about you. About how different things would be if only I could have gotten past my own ridiculous insecurities and honestly told you how I felt.

    This heartache is getting out of hand.

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