• Was it real for you too?

    by  • September 18, 2010 • Doubt, Heartbreak, Lost Love, Love - Pure and Simple • 1 Comment

    did you ever love me?

    i’m not sure you did, though you said it first.

    you also stopped loving me first. you broke my heart and now i’m wondering if you ever loved me. i used to think you did but then i came across a recent email to your ex. in the email you said you still love her. did you always love her? even with me? did you call her babygirl too? did you take her for cheesy fries when she was sad? was i just a place holder until she came back? just a person to pass the time with? i hope not.

    i look back on our memories together and now there’s this horrible feeling that it was all fake. i believe you cared about me but i dont know if you loved me. i hope i wasn’t just convenient. i hope you didnt keep me around to make yourself feel better and to get through the time until she came back to you. i could handle you falling out of love with me. it would hurt but i would heal.

    i’m not sure how i will handle this if it is true. was our love real or just convenient? i don’t know if i have the courage to ask you that yet but hopefully someday soon i will.


    One Response to Was it real for you too?

    1. Nameless
      November 5, 2010 at 8:33 pm

      Unfortunately I know exactly how you feel. I’ve been there too. My ex had a girlfriend before me for 2 yrs. Him and I were together for a little over 3 yrs. She was always in issue in the begining of our relationship. Should have seen it then. But of course things got better between us. And then we broke up. I too saw emails between them. I even found a bag in his room with memories of them… after 3 yrs of us being together! Its like a stab in the heart with the knife twisting. And sure enough after we broke up, the got back together. I found out the day of my aunts funeral. I know how it feels to wonder if it was all just a lie. I’m so sorry you have to go through this too. I finally just convinced my self it was a lie, it was the only answer I could bring myself to.

    Leave a Reply