You were my best friend and my boyfriend.
I had every cliche feeling in the world to describe how I felt for you. We had our numerous inside jokes, our little ticks, and yet… we never fought. Our relationship was a friendship set on fire; and it was beautiful. We were in a play together over the summer, we would hang out at my house and watch countless youtube videos, we would go to the beach and just act like our nerdy selves.. everything was in it’s right place.
Now, I am convinced you’re completely over it. I know, you told me you just need time. I know in your letters you implied this was not permanent…
I just feel so unwanted when I’m with you now. I’ll blame it on stress, I’ll blame it on everything else. I’m just…sorry. Sorry for not being able to help you through this; obviously I was becoming more of a nuisance than a help. But, I really was a supportive, positive figure in your life.
I know, you need time to get your head straight. And trust me, I will wait for you. No matter how many times everyone tells me to move on, I won’t. I’m in love with you, and I just want you to be happy. Nothing is going to change that.
So, we’ll still be partners in dance, we’ll still smile at each other in the hallway. I’ll just be the one covering up my pain with a smile like a typical lovesick teenager. I just keep asking myself… is this permanent? If not, how long?
Time will only tell.