• You only ever disappoint me

    by  • September 17, 2010 • Anger, Disappointment, Eff Off - You - or Up, Frustration • 0 Comments

    Dude, what the fuck?

    As if I don’t already have enough self-doubt. Why the fuck do you always ask me to hang out, allowing my fragile heart to feel eager and warranted expectation, only to fucking blow me off every time? That’s even worse than ignoring me in the first place!

    Stop giving me false hope. In my anger, I recognize that this probably means you’re not worth my time, but once my anger abates, which it will surely do more quickly than it probably should, I know I’ll just fall for your charm again.

    Fuck. I’m a fucking idiot, and you’re a fucking asshole!

    How come 95% of the time, when you’re only giving me reasons to resent you, I blindly see only the positive aspects of your character? Aspects of your character that you seem to reserve for everyone but me?

    I’m a masochist, that’s the only explanation. But just because I’m an idiotic, self-loathing masochist doesn’t mean that you have to play the part of the sadist that loves to crush my feelings.

    I wish you knew how much each little disappointment hurts me.

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