As I walk through my days I find so many things I’d like to share with you.
Our lives seem interwoven, and it is so natural to share thoughts and feelings and experiences. I come up with witty jokes I want to share with you, and laugh until we cry. I want to share recent experiences. Nothing earth-shattering. Just normal everyday stuff. I want to ask you all about the last three years. How you’ve been. The details of your life. I want to smile as I hear about your joys, and comfort you as you share your hurts and confusion.
We’ve only recently reconnected, and I know we got so much going on. And we’re not naive, foolish, or stupid….though our emotions would lead us to believe otherwise.
I want you to know that I, like you, desire to sit, and share, and hold, and brush away the hair from the side of your face as you tell me of your life. I want to sit really really really really close and look into your eyes. We can discuss easy topics. Or very difficult sensitive ones. They all seem so easy with you.
The weather, your clothing, religion, family, desires, songs, our future. Everything is open for disclosure. And I know there is no fear of judegment either way. There is real freedom with you.
I have always enjoyed this with you. But it’s been a long time. We have always had a freedom together, and maybe this comfort is what feels so good. To finally be accepted, and to know we really appreciate each other regardless of our situations.
I know it is so hard to share with our present restrictions. Walls have been put around us that we can’t even break w/ modern technology! Seems silly, but true. Our obligations tie us into routines that we can’t get away.
Some would say it’s for the best. Others would say we’re just being foolish. Some would even say to move on.
Well, I can’t write this in the open air, or send in a letter, or even tell you this in person. So I’ll write it here.
I’ll hold you as precious in my memory, and know you do the same. Time will pass over us, and we’ll grow and change and love and progress…as all things do.
It is painful not having you share with me..