by  • September 14, 2010 • Confusion, Grief, Lost Love, Self-Esteem • 0 Comments

    We’ve been together for 2 years.

    I feel that I truly never loved you.

    I was at first with you cause I was mad. The one person I truly ever loved fucked me up. And you know that, and he was before you.

    I’m writing this to tell you I’m sorry. I’m sorry for faking this for 2 years. I will admit I had a close bond with you, I will admit that I started to love you but, not REAL love.

    I feel that the moment you told me you were leaving it was the moment to say that we can’t be together anymore. You’ve been out for 4 months and I still talk with you every single day on the phone and tell you that I love you a thousand times.

    I noticed that you are weird with me. That month that I visited you didn’t mean anything. Just that we could have sex. And we didn’t had that much of it. Cause you find me disgusting.

    I know that you are no longer attracted to me. I know I put up some weight but is not a lot. You are sure making a really big deal of it. And my self esteem is lower than has ever been and it keeps going lower. You don’t tell me I’m pretty anymore.. Other people do it. It’s not the same. I feel so lonely. Everyone is so far from me.

    I don’t want to be with you, I don’t want to be without you.

    I don’t know what I want.

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