I have written you a cliche letter already… so this one will never be sent.
I tell you I’m okay; I tell myself I’m okay..but am I?
You were my first love: of course I’m hurting, to say the least. I have so many questions as to why you decided to break off our relationship so suddenly. It would have been 5 months this past past friday… 5 months strong, or so I thought.
You told me recently how you were irrational with your decision, I just don’t understand anymore. I wasn’t always yearning for your attention, I wasn’t a burden; I was always there for you. We were best friends and so much more. You’re going to college in less than a year. You have so much stress and problems facing your way. I was just so convinced that I would be there for you no matter what happened; like I had been before. The one you laugh with, the one you cry with, the one that you’re just you with.
But, you told me we just needed some time apart. And though every day without you is hard; though I may cry and feel so broken… I truly just want you to be happy.
Even the week after we broke up, we still actually remained best friends. We’re still singing out love song duet for thespians, and we still hang out and joke around. The only thing we don’t do now is kiss, hold hands, or say I love you. Though I do not understand your reasonings, I accept them. Because it’s what will make you happy.
Today is my birthday. It wasn’t a good one.. that is, until you talked to me. It was a normal “happy birthday” conversation, but you have no idea how happy it made me feel.
I am going to be okay. Though everyone around me is telling me to move on, I’m still going to wait. Even if it ends up that you don’t want me there, I’ll stick around until then. I just don’t feel the same for anyone else. You’ve got quite a hold on me.
So, here’s to friendship. Here’s to my love for you. I’ll be here waiting, friend.