• FUMING.

    by  • August 30, 2010 • Anger, Betrayal, Friends, Frustration, Lost Love • 0 Comments

    dear bitch,

    i do not even know where to begin. i don’t know what emotion i’m experiencing right now, i don’t know if i’m supposed to laugh or cry or scream. all i know is that i want to do all of those things, and it is 100% because of you. you were my friend, i trusted you. i repeatedly proved myself as a friend to you, i told you on numerous occasions that i would always be there for you. i was honest with you even when it was hard for me to bring myself to say certain things. i helped you when you were injured. i let you cry on my shoulder when your parents had failed you. i chased you when you ran away. i don’t know how i could have been a better friend to you to be perfectly honest.

    through a summer of trying to figure out who i am and what people i need in my life, i’m beginning to realize that you aren’t necessarily a person i need. through EVERYTHING i have done for you, you find a way to fuck my over. you treat people like shit, you walk all over them for absolutely reason. you walk around like you’re better than everyone else and you are constantly judging people you do not even know. i have news for you, YOU HAVE LITERALLY NO ROOM TO JUDGE ANYONE. i am done. i am done with you walking all over me. i am done with you treating me like shit.

    i kept your secrets, you told all of mine. i helped you during your hard times, you are the cause of my hard times. i went out of my way to make you feel like you’re not alone, you have made me feel more alone in these two days than i did the four months i spend in a different state.

    i made some poor decisions last year and i will be the first person to admit that. i did things i’m really not proud of, but none of them related to our friendship other than the fact that i trusted you enough to tell you. what do you do? tell everyone without my consent. one event in particular changed me a lot, and you could see by my physical and emotional state that i was an absolute wreck. you were there for me when i needed you and i so greatly appreciate that. however a couple weeks later, i’m moving on with someone i really began to like. he was a fling that i will probably never see again, that you not just neglected to tell me you hooked up with, but flat out lied to me about. if that wasn’t enough i know that you told our other friend you hooked up with him. while you two let me fall for this asshole, knowing he had already been with you, knowing this wasn’t going to be good for me in the end, you fucking let me make a fool out of myself. how could you not tell me? how could you lie to me? i would have never done that to you, and i don’t know what i ever did to deserve you treating me this way.

    so i’m done. you can talk to me in a mature fashion, which i know you will never do. but until you do, we aren’t speaking. you might be okay with acting like things are fine but i’m not. you had to know that i would find out eventually. so congrats, with each day the passes and with every lie you tell to me, just know that you are single handedly destroying our friendship i used to value greatly.

    peace.

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