• You’re with the angels now

    by  • August 29, 2010 • Children, Heartbreak, Love - Pure and Simple, Those Gone Before Us • 0 Comments

    Dear sweetpea,

    You weren’t with me for very long. In fact I only carried you with me for 2 months. But those 2 months turned out to be beautiful and I cherish them. I know when I first found out I was going to have you I paniced, I didn’t know what to do. In the end I had to make the decision, I didn’t want to get rid of you, you were my sweetpea and I wanted the time to come when I could hold you in my arms, but it wasn’t the right time, I wasn’t ready and I couldn’t give you what you needed. But I didn’t expect to lose you like that. I cried the day I lost you. I cried and then couldn’t cry anymore. I wanted to cry but I sat there and it wouldn’t come. I felt relief, knowing I didn’ have to go through with it, but you were my sweetpea, and I lost a part of me the day I lost you.

    I guess I’m writing this to say I loved you, with every inch of my being cause you were part of me and I was part of you. I don’t care if I only carried you for 2 months, and I couldn’t keep you even if I wanted to. I loved you and carried you with so much care for the time I could, but God only sent you to see my womb and nothing more. But I hope one day I will get to hold you, when we meet again, the time will be right. I won’t forget you or stop loving you.

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